End-of-Life, Social Work/Helping Profession/Mental Health

‘Nobody wants to talk about death:’ Patients’ stories inspire play about palliative care – Entertainment – CBC News — Loss, Grief, Bereavement and Life Transitions Resource Library

Thank you as always Sue Rosenbloom.  🙂

Death is not easy and a diagnosis of, “You are dying” is not easy, but it is reality for some.

What would you do with the time you have left? Would you say goodbye to special people in your life? Would you visit special places you always wanted to see? Do you have things you want to finish before you die?

A play about death is awesome! It makes one think. It makes one realize that life is not permanent.

 

Source: ‘Nobody wants to talk about death:’ Patients’ stories inspire play about palliative care – Entertainment – CBC News

via ‘Nobody wants to talk about death:’ Patients’ stories inspire play about palliative care – Entertainment – CBC News — Loss, Grief, Bereavement and Life Transitions Resource Library

End-of-Life, Social Work/Helping Profession/Mental Health

Shared via Sacred Dying – Helping create a better death is a new doula concept | Pittsburgh Post-Gazette — Loss, Grief, Bereavement and Life Transitions Resource Library

As a professional who is part of a doula network; I am very glad to see this article.

I am currently completing an End of Life certification program, but my focus is on awareness raising, trainings for professionals and lay-people, discussion groups on the topics of death, dying, and end of life (Food for Thought groups) and writing.

The word doula instinctively makes one think about birth and babies, but in this instance it is a death doula. A trained individual to be with people who are at the end of life. To sit with them, chat with them, to just be there. Some family members are working, out of town and a death doula can assist so that the person who is palliative or in hospice is not alone.

Thoughts on the idea?

 

Source: Helping create a better death is a new doula concept | Pittsburgh Post-Gazette

via Shared via Sacred Dying – Helping create a better death is a new doula concept | Pittsburgh Post-Gazette — Loss, Grief, Bereavement and Life Transitions Resource Library

Education, End-of-Life, Grief/Grieving/Bereavement, Humanity, Social Work/Helping Profession/Mental Health

Hmmm…Convos on Death?

An article I came across on LinkedIn today by a colleague whom I know through LinkedIn is titled:

What we can learn from death rites of the past will help us treat the dead and grieving better today

 

“This taboo around death is a fairly modern, Western phenomenon. Past and present, societies have dealt with death and dying in diverse ways. It is clear from, for example, the outpouring of grief at Princess Diana’s death, and the conversations opening up around the 20th anniversary of the event, that these outlets are needed in our society too. High-profile celebrity deaths serve as sporadic catalysts for conversations that should be happening every day, in everyday lives.”

There is a group of individuals around the world trying to change this taboo and make death part of life again, meaning discussions and planning need to occur! I am one of these individuals; there are many more of us.

Why the fear? What changed over the past 100 years? Death happened at home in the past. The funeral and wake took place in the home and the whole community attended and assisted with the burial.

Then WWII happened and all changed. Too much death maybe? Too much destruction? More wars followed after….and still death is taboo today. Slowly this is changing….more of us are being vocal about the need for change, for discussions, but we are also the younger generation meaning baby boomers and younger.

Funerals are expensive! Burials are expensive! The average person needs 10-20k to die if using traditional funeral homes and doing a traditional burial. That is a lot of money and many do not have it. I do not have it. I opt for a more green burial and less expensive one as I am sure many others do or will as well.

“It was not so long ago in the UK that public outpouring of grief and practices that kept the dead close were acceptable. For example, in Victorian England, mourning clothes and jewelry were commonplace – Queen Victoria wore black for decades in mourning for Prince Albert.”

Today, death has been outsourced to professionals and, for many, dying happens in hospitals. But many doctors and nurses themselves feel uncomfortable with broaching the subject with relatives. Why is this? Are they not receiving training while in school? Why no training or discussions in the work place?

To work in a hospital, hospice or palliative care unit, to work with older adults…one must realize that patients and clients will die. Heck, we are all going to die one day! Accept this fact, stop trying to look younger and live longer with unnecessary tests, medications, and treatments if there is no hope, no proof it will help.

Instead, spend time with loved ones, enjoy life, and make the most of the time we have left…

Aging/Gerontology, Education, End-of-Life, Humanity, News, Social Work/Helping Profession/Mental Health

Who Wants to Talk About Death? Not me, Says Most…

Death, dying, end of life, palliative, hospice-most do not want to delve into these topics. Why? What is one afraid of? The inevitable? We will all die one day. I am realisitic…to be born, we will die.

I tell my kids all the time that everything will die at some time; the trees, grass, flowers, pets, humans….no choice and even if it was a choice; I would not want to live forever. BUT, in the meantime, while I am alive, I want to make the most of it! I want to enjoy life, spend quality time with my kids and fiancé, continue to do the things I enjoy like cycling and writing.

I recently attended a staff training/development at my work and we were asked to write down 3 things that are MOST important to us. I wrote my kids, my fiancé, and writing. I can live without things and objects as long as I have the above 3! Quality time with the ones we love is important. Doing what you enjoy is important. Giving back is important and I very much believe in ‘pay it forward.’ Someone helps me, I help someone else no questions asked (within reason).

Ok, now I will segway into an article I came across on LinkedIn today that I think is important. Death is not as frightening as we think. Take a look at it as it describes and compares individuals who are dying in hospice and palliative, and prisoners on death row.

http://nymag.com/scienceofus/2017/08/dying-may-not-be-as-frightening-as-we-imagine-it-will-be.html

I would love to have feedback and hear your thoughts!

End-of-Life, Healthcare, Humanity, Social Work/Helping Profession/Mental Health

Life, Love…

{“Jack Davies hasn’t planned his funeral but he knows how he wants to die. When the time comes – and soon – the 53-year-old says he will succumb to the terminal cancer ravaging his organs.  He doesn’t want resuscitation or medical intervention to prolong life. He doesn’t want to be rushed to Nambour General Hospital. He just wants to lay quietly in bed, at home in Tewantin, with wife Ange by his side, singing softly into his ear which doctors say will be the last sense to go. “I know I’m going to die,” whispers Jack in a weak and breathy voice, as he sits pale and tired on his favourite couch in a dark, curtained lounge room. “I’m just happy I’ll die at home.”}

Given the choice, many would also choose this option; to die at home surrounded by those that we love and are important to us. Most do not want to be in a hopsital in an uncomfortable bed, surrounded by medical staff, listening to machines and being attached to tubes. I don’t.

Others may choose the medical environment as they do not want their loved ones to witness ‘their’ slowly deterioration and eventual death.

What would you choose if you had the choice? Home or hospital?

 

Source: Life, Love

https://www.backstorynewsmag.com/single-post/2017/01/24/Life-Love-Dying

via Life, Love

End-of-Life, Grief/Grieving/Bereavement, Healthcare, Humanity, News, Social Work/Helping Profession/Mental Health

Self-Promotion of Journey’s End…

There is nothing like coming home and finding a box leaning against your front door and when you rip it open, there are your author copies of the book that you spent 2.5 years writing and editing!

Such joy, such elation, such happiness, such a sense of accomplishment… so, Julie and I are busy marketing and strategizing how we each will use the book as we come from different backgrounds.

As a social worker/case manager/group facilitator, I have big plans with this book that will compliment my consulting business NorthernMSW, that I just launched last month, very well.

My goal, my mission, my passion is to raise awareness about death, dying, and end of life; provide education and training to professionals, lay-people and facilitate workshops, support groups, and discussion groups on this topic. A topic most ignore, pretend does not exist, do not discuss, and do not plan for.

Why is that? Why the fear? To be born, we will die. With any luck, we live a long life, but we never know…

Julie and I collaborated on this book to begin what we term ‘inspirational’ discussions, to further cultural awareness, understanding, and acceptance.

I have stated in other posts that I am an organ donor. To me, there is no greater mitzvah than to have my organs help someone else live a longer life after I have died…. My fiancé knows this and it is on my driver’s license.

Next, comes the ‘BIG’ talk and decisions of advance care directives and mandates; especially since I am getting married next June. I have 2 kids to think about. While they have a father to look after them, in case, my life insurance, and any pensions will go to both my kids and my soon-to be-husband.

Not a very happy conversation, BUT a needed one.

So, Julie and I collaborated and created this wonderful book that has so many perspectives in it from birth to death-abortions, miscarriages, child death, spousal death, friend death, partner death, pet death, client and patient death, resource information, training information, grief and bereavement information, checklists to plan, funeral information, advance care and mandate information and a chapter on an all to taboo topic-euthanasia and assisted dying, but it is a presentation of the facts and what exists around the world, along with quotes and more…..there is no other book like it on the shelves of any book store or library because I always look. An all in one book!

No matter how many times I read this book I am in awe of the contributions, the stories shared and yes, sometimes I tear up and other times I laugh….that is what life is about!

It is available on Xlibris, Amazon.com, Amazon.ca, Barnes & Noble.  We are very proud of this book and owe a HUGE thank you to all who contributed as we would not have the book we have if not for all of the contributor’s perspectives.

So, from the bottom of our hearts, you have our gratitude and sincere appreciation!

The contributors are:

Elaine Mansfield

Evelyne Banks

Cheryl Jones

Jean Bota

Jordon Grumet, MD

Linda Darrah Reynolds

Jan Larsen-Fendt, RN, BSN

Carol Brannan Marimpietri

Sue Rumack (Canada)

Anonymous x 2 (1 Canada & 1 USA)

Maria Kubitz

John Brooks

Elizabeth Gillman, RN, BSN

Victoria Hargis

Pamela Christie

Sherokee Ilse

Keith Branson, MA

Patty Burgess

Mark Darrah

Virginia L. Seno, PhD

David Laliberte, AEMCA, PCP (Canada)

Karen Wyatt, MD

Karen Smith, PhD

Major Lynn Jones, Retired

Yosef Ben Avraham Yaacov

Rea L. Ginsberg, LCSW-C, ACSW, BCD

Anne Lastman, BA, MA, MTS

Rabbi Michael Wolff (Canada)

Salima Pirani

Robert S. Ball, MSN, RN

James C. Salwitz, MD

Claire Willis, LICSW

Andrew Thurston, MD

Barbara Bates Sedoric

Blair Botsford (Canada)

Donald M. Burrows

Eleanor Silverberg (Canada)

Robin Gordon Taft

Steve Byrne

Jeff Haberson

Cassandra Yonder (Canada)

Heather Taylor, RN (Canada)

Vicki M. Taylor

Sheryl Beller-Kenner, EdD (Canada)

Lee Witting

John Shuster, MD

Karen Wyatt, MD

Cynthia Cooper, RN

Sheryl J. Nicholson

Marcy Rosen Bernstein, LMSW

Gabriel Heras La Calle, MD (Spain)

Guillermo Godoy, MD

Sheryl Beller-Kenner, EdD

James Salwitz, MD

Along with various perspectives from both Julie Saeger Nierenberg (Canada)

and myself; Victoria Brewster (Canada)

Aging/Gerontology, End-of-Life, Grief/Grieving/Bereavement, Health Conditions/Diseases, Healthcare, Humanity, ICU, News, Social Work/Helping Profession/Mental Health

‘Journey’s End’ is Available!

Julie and I are very excited to announce that our book is available on the Xlibris website at: www.xlibris.com.

Journey’s End: Death, Dying, and the End of Life; 2.5 years in the making is finally available. Thank you to all who contributed to our book. We never could have done it without you…

The book is also on goodreadsamazon.com, amazon.ca, Barnes & Noble.